Don't worry, ik heb zelf ook geen idee waar de helft over gaat x]
Fanfiction van The Amazing Spiderman 2 -forgivemydramaplease-
I remember. I remember the tears. I remember how terrible the pain was. Is. The pain is terrible. I remember the fear, the fear of losing her. I remember how I lost her.
I remember her eyes, her lips, her smile. I remember how she danced and laughed and talked. I remember how she told me she loved me, and I remember how she told me she hated me.
I remember everything.
I remember nothing.
I remember how empty my life is. I remember how I cried when I helt her in my arms, how the tears wouldn’t come when she was burried. I remember how my lips were sealed, how words couldn’t find me. How I couldn’t find words.
Sometimes, I even remember the time before hér. I remember that it was a dull place, without any colour. I remember how colourful that time was compared to now.
I’m lonely. I want people to be with me. I want to be left alone. I want…
I want her back.
The pain was crushing. Not te bone-crushing, soon-to-dissappear pain I was used to. Not even as painful as when I was electrofied just minutes ago.
Minutes ago. Ten minutes ago she was still alive. Gwenn.
Guilt, loss and anger fought deep down inside me. From the outside I just cried and shouted her name, desperately hoping for her to just wake up with a jolt, surprising me with a clever joke.
But I knew too the she was gone. No words could revive her. And it was my fault. I should have taken better precautions. I should have made sure she was absolutely safe.
But not for a moment I would’ve thought she’d die.
When she fell… I was all adrenaline and fear. Her eyes… they just stared. She didn’t make a sound. No screaming. No fear in her eyes. Just surprise. She hadn’t expected to fall. She’d trusted me.
And I let het down – literally. I let her fall and now she was dead.
Her dad warned me. He’d told me that I would be the death of her. I should’ve just let her go to London. She would’ve been safe. But no, I had had to drag her right back into danger with me.
It was my fault she’s dead. How was I supposed to life with this guilt? This anger, this… uselessness. I can’t do anything. Not her beloved science, not my powers, not anything could bring her back to me. I hate my powers. She… she is dead because of them. They killed her. How can I ever use them again? How? Maybe I should’t. Maybe it would just be for the best if I let them go.
If I let Spider-Man go.
‘Peter!’
My aunts voice wakes me from my precious sleep. I murmer something about needing soundproof walls and turn around. Whatever she has waken me for, I don’t want to go there. I feel terrible. My whole body hurts, the feeling I always have after a fight.
I fall back asleep, but wake up again from the door opening.
‘Peter… You should really get up.’ My aunt doesn’t sound her usual self. Pitty and sadness has filled her voice.
Worried, I turn around an look at her. Why does she sound so sad?
She is fully dressed in black, even wears high heels, and she holds a crumpled tissue in her hand. I can see her hand shaking.
I frown up at her, not understanding. My brain is foggy as hell today.
‘We have to go. The… the funeral starts in about half an hour.’
Funeral? Who’s funeral? Uncle Ben… No, he has been dead for months. Has he?
I’m feeling disorientated. Is this a dream? A nightmare? I frown, unsure of anything.
Tears well up in aunty May’s eyes.
‘Oh, my boy…’ she whispers as she stumbles to my bed. I sit up and she holds me in a tight embrace. ‘It’s Gwenn…’ she mutters in my neck.
For some reason, time seems to be standing still for a moment. Gwenn? What’s wrong with Gwenn? Didn’t she leave for London? I remember aunty May’s words from earlier. Funeral.
Did someone in Gwenn’s family die? Maybe… Maybe…
Maybe Gwenn died.
All of a sudden al my memories from the past couple of days return to me. The fight, the other fight, and then…
It’s to hot. I can’t breath.
Rudely I push aunty May away, desperately trying to get air in my lungs. They seem to have been knocked empty.
Gwenn.
‘Gwenn?’ I whisper, horrified. I bend over and rest my hands on my knees, like I’ve just ran three marathons. It can’t be. Wasn’t it just a nightmare?
When I look up at my aunt I see my worst fear confirmed in her eyes.
‘Oh god…’ I exhale.
Fanfiction van The Amazing Spiderman 2 -forgivemydramaplease-
I remember. I remember the tears. I remember how terrible the pain was. Is. The pain is terrible. I remember the fear, the fear of losing her. I remember how I lost her.
I remember her eyes, her lips, her smile. I remember how she danced and laughed and talked. I remember how she told me she loved me, and I remember how she told me she hated me.
I remember everything.
I remember nothing.
I remember how empty my life is. I remember how I cried when I helt her in my arms, how the tears wouldn’t come when she was burried. I remember how my lips were sealed, how words couldn’t find me. How I couldn’t find words.
Sometimes, I even remember the time before hér. I remember that it was a dull place, without any colour. I remember how colourful that time was compared to now.
I’m lonely. I want people to be with me. I want to be left alone. I want…
I want her back.
The pain was crushing. Not te bone-crushing, soon-to-dissappear pain I was used to. Not even as painful as when I was electrofied just minutes ago.
Minutes ago. Ten minutes ago she was still alive. Gwenn.
Guilt, loss and anger fought deep down inside me. From the outside I just cried and shouted her name, desperately hoping for her to just wake up with a jolt, surprising me with a clever joke.
But I knew too the she was gone. No words could revive her. And it was my fault. I should have taken better precautions. I should have made sure she was absolutely safe.
But not for a moment I would’ve thought she’d die.
When she fell… I was all adrenaline and fear. Her eyes… they just stared. She didn’t make a sound. No screaming. No fear in her eyes. Just surprise. She hadn’t expected to fall. She’d trusted me.
And I let het down – literally. I let her fall and now she was dead.
Her dad warned me. He’d told me that I would be the death of her. I should’ve just let her go to London. She would’ve been safe. But no, I had had to drag her right back into danger with me.
It was my fault she’s dead. How was I supposed to life with this guilt? This anger, this… uselessness. I can’t do anything. Not her beloved science, not my powers, not anything could bring her back to me. I hate my powers. She… she is dead because of them. They killed her. How can I ever use them again? How? Maybe I should’t. Maybe it would just be for the best if I let them go.
If I let Spider-Man go.
‘Peter!’
My aunts voice wakes me from my precious sleep. I murmer something about needing soundproof walls and turn around. Whatever she has waken me for, I don’t want to go there. I feel terrible. My whole body hurts, the feeling I always have after a fight.
I fall back asleep, but wake up again from the door opening.
‘Peter… You should really get up.’ My aunt doesn’t sound her usual self. Pitty and sadness has filled her voice.
Worried, I turn around an look at her. Why does she sound so sad?
She is fully dressed in black, even wears high heels, and she holds a crumpled tissue in her hand. I can see her hand shaking.
I frown up at her, not understanding. My brain is foggy as hell today.
‘We have to go. The… the funeral starts in about half an hour.’
Funeral? Who’s funeral? Uncle Ben… No, he has been dead for months. Has he?
I’m feeling disorientated. Is this a dream? A nightmare? I frown, unsure of anything.
Tears well up in aunty May’s eyes.
‘Oh, my boy…’ she whispers as she stumbles to my bed. I sit up and she holds me in a tight embrace. ‘It’s Gwenn…’ she mutters in my neck.
For some reason, time seems to be standing still for a moment. Gwenn? What’s wrong with Gwenn? Didn’t she leave for London? I remember aunty May’s words from earlier. Funeral.
Did someone in Gwenn’s family die? Maybe… Maybe…
Maybe Gwenn died.
All of a sudden al my memories from the past couple of days return to me. The fight, the other fight, and then…
It’s to hot. I can’t breath.
Rudely I push aunty May away, desperately trying to get air in my lungs. They seem to have been knocked empty.
Gwenn.
‘Gwenn?’ I whisper, horrified. I bend over and rest my hands on my knees, like I’ve just ran three marathons. It can’t be. Wasn’t it just a nightmare?
When I look up at my aunt I see my worst fear confirmed in her eyes.
‘Oh god…’ I exhale.
